Virgie Tovar

Virgie Tovar

Bio

Virgie Tovar, MA is an author, activist and one of the nation's leading experts and lecturers on fat discrimination and body image. She is the editor of Hot & Heavy: Fierce Fat Girls on Life, Love and Fashion (Seal Press, November 2012) and the mind behind #LoseHateNotWeight. She holds a Master's degree in Human Sexuality with a focus on the intersections of body size, race and gender. After teaching "Female Sexuality" at the University of California at Berkeley, where she completed a Bachelor's degree in Political Science in 2005, she went onto host "The Virgie Show" (CBS Radio) in San Francisco. She is certified as a sex educator and was voted Best Sex Writer by the Bay Area Guardian in 2008 for her first book. Virgie has been featured by the New York Times, MTV, Al Jazeera, the San Francisco Chronicle, NPR, Huffington Post, Bust Magazine, Jezebel, 7x7 Magazine, XOJane, and SF Weekly as well as on Women’s Entertainment Television and The Ricki Lake Show. Her most recent speaking engagements have included University of Washington, Earlham College, Hollins University, University of California at Berkeley, University of California at Davis, California College of the Arts, Sonoma State University, and Humboldt State University. She lives in San Francisco and offers workshops and lectures nationwide. Find her online at www.virgietovar.com. And on instagram. 

Virgie Tovar Articles

I say — fuck the high road. Image: Virgie Tovar.

Take The Cake: An Open Letter To The Woman Who Gave Me Stink Eye For My VBO

If you asked me to guess what was going through her head, I would say she was in shock that a fat lady would wear a tight skirt, belly in full sight. This feminist act of taking up space, tacitly but clearly making room for myself in a fatphobic culture, is a bold-but-crucial move if you’re my brand of fat babe.

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image credit: Virgie Tovar via Instagram

Take The Cake: 3 Reasons I Don’t Use The Word “Bully”

The word “bully” makes us think we’re talking about a tiny handful of anti-social individuals when in fact we’re talking about a group of people.

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I thought we both knew he was our enemy, but in reality you both were mine.

Take The Cake: An Open Letter To The Woman Who Betrayed Me

I told you I never wanted to speak to him again. I offered that we work together to rid him from our lives. I thought we had both made the realization that he was garbage, but in reality, only I had.

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In my limited experience, I have always felt that BBW events were spaces designed by fat women for men — frequently thin ones.

Take The Cake: My First BBW Bash

My jaw clenches in judgmental discomfort whenever I think of any event with "BBW" in the title. To me, the term "BBW" is coded. When I hear that word, my eyes begin a preemptive roll as the keywords "heteronormativity," "hookup," "gendered labor," "mansplaining," and "ugh" scroll past the neon pink kiosk in my brain.

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"After trying to avoid completely ceasing communication with both my mother and grandmother, I realized I had come to the end of another road."

Take The Cake: Breaking Up With My Family, Part 2

There had only been room for a persona - a sunshiney child-parent. My mother and grandmother had always fixated on my childhood. It finally made sense how the happiest time of their lives could be my darkest.

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The 3 Levels of Fatphobia are intrapersonal, interpersonal, and institutional.

Take The Cake: The 3 Levels Of Fatphobia

The 3 Levels of Fatphobia are intrapersonal, interpersonal, and institutional. Yes, everyone is affected by fatphobia. But the follow-up question is: How?

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"This is the subtlety of advertising that doesn’t escape people like me. It is even more powerful because of its deniability. It’s like the dirty joke at the dinner table that the kids miss." Image: author

Take The Cake: Power To The Thinnest

Last week I posted an image of myself on Instagram, middle finger raised, in front of an enormous ad that said “Power to the Thinnest.”

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image credit: Virgie Tovar via Instagram

Take The Cake: 3 Powerful Romantic Solidarity Strategies Between Thin & Fat Women

Solidarity strategies are possible. They happen all the time — though often less frequently in the realm of romance, unfortunately.

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image credit: Virgie Tovar via Instagram

Take The Cake: Yes, Fat Women Actually Date Amazing People

I’ve dated people of all sizes, income levels, and personality types. I only get questions when I’m dating someone whose status is seen as “above” my own.

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image credit: Virgie Tovar via Instagram

Take The Cake: I Fight For This Fat Brown Feminine Body

What does it mean to want this body? What does it mean to fight for this brown, fat feminine body? In this culture, it means revolution.

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